Hey everyone ! I’m back with an unplanned article (so it’s gonna be a little messy ^^) that I decided to write even if there already are a crapload of articles on this video/subject, I wanted to talk about it too because it’s been eye-opening for me concerning a problem I’ve dealt with for a long time (and maybe you too): way too high expectations.
Yesterday I stumbled upon an old Jenna Marbles video about the importance of having low to no expectations in your life. This video reminded me why I love Jenna : she super funny, of course, but she also has amazing ideas when it comes to more serious subjects !
Basically, she says that the secret to be happier is not to have any expectations about the consequences of our actions. And I thank it’s so damn true ! We all at some point have this problem: we want to succeed absolutely and never fail AKA perfectionnism ! But we all know that it’s as realistic as travelling the world riding a flying llama ! Despite this fact, we keep clinging onto this illusion as if we could not survive without it…
What she said was like an electric shock for me. No need to be stressed anymore, we have to go with the flow of life and keep appreciating the learning process by working passionately. In a nutshell, live in the present moment et give the best of you AKA Hakuna Matata, but in a more realistic way ! Yeah, I mean, you cannot spend your life tanning your butt and eating worms haha !
She also explains that you can also have high standards, as much goals as you want and that you should work the best possible towards your goals… without expecting anything! Like sending your intentions somewhere in the Universe without really knowing where it’s gonna lead et accepting the fact that you only have control on your own actions but not on what they’ll make happen.
I have to admit that it seemed pretty difficult and idealistic for me at the beginning, but when you start by little things it’s completely possible and that allowed me to avoid so much disappointement and negative feelings !
That’s also exactly what Bruno Lallement, a French best-seller author and motivational speeker said during one of his speeches “the art of using your thoughts” .Sorry it only exists in French and there are no English subtitles but basically, he quotes Benjamin Franklin “I always prepare myself for the worst, so I’ll never be decieved.” His explanation completes what Jenna says since he affirms that when you’re too scared of failure, you put all of your energy in fighting against this fear instead of your own working process. The idea is to get prepared to fail. He even says that you have to get familiar with bad things that could happen (even death) so you’re not paralyzed anymore about what may/may not happen !
To go through this process, you need a lot a bravery but in my opinion it’s the best thing to do since you cannot control those things. It allowed me to understand that we’re all equal when it comes to life’s ups and downs because everybody go though them, but the ones that can surf on these crazy waves in this ocean of possibilities do better in life (and they probably have a similar mindset to Jenna’s ;))
Even if we can’t control the world around us, we can control ourserlves, always progress and live our lives the way we want if we allow ourselves to do it (this was probably the cheesiest conclusion I have ever written haha !)
Skittles & M&M’s !
Pixie McQueen