***THE SECRET OF HAPPINESS***

Hey everyone ! I’m back with an unplanned article (so it’s gonna be a little messy ^^) that I decided to write even if there already are a crapload of articles on this video/subject, I wanted to talk about it too because it’s been eye-opening for me concerning a problem I’ve dealt with for a long time (and maybe you too): way too high expectations.

Yesterday I stumbled upon an old Jenna Marbles video about the importance of having low to no expectations in your life. This video reminded me why I love Jenna : she super funny, of course, but she also has amazing ideas when it comes to more serious subjects !

Basically, she says that the secret to be happier is not to have any expectations about the consequences of our actions. And I thank it’s so damn true ! We all at some point have this problem: we want to succeed absolutely and never fail AKA perfectionnism ! But we all know that it’s as realistic as travelling the world riding a flying llama ! Despite this fact, we keep clinging onto this illusion as if we could not survive without it…

Jenna Gif

What she said was like an electric shock for me. No need to be stressed anymore, we have to go with the flow of life and keep appreciating the learning process by working passionately. In a nutshell, live in the present moment et give the best of you AKA Hakuna Matata, but in a more realistic way ! Yeah, I mean, you cannot spend your life tanning your butt and eating worms haha !

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She also explains that you can also have high standards, as much goals as you want and that you should work the best possible towards your goals… without expecting anything! Like sending your intentions somewhere in the Universe without really knowing where it’s gonna lead et accepting the fact that you only have control on your own actions but not on what they’ll make happen.

I have to admit that it seemed pretty difficult and idealistic for me at the beginning, but when you start by little things it’s completely possible and that allowed me to avoid so much disappointement and negative feelings !

That’s also exactly what Bruno Lallement, a French best-seller author and motivational speeker said during one of his speeches “the art of using your thoughts” .Sorry it only exists in French and there are no English subtitles but basically, he quotes Benjamin Franklin “I always prepare myself for the worst, so I’ll never be decieved.” His explanation completes what Jenna says since he affirms that when you’re too scared of failure, you put all of your energy in fighting against this fear instead of your own working process. The idea is to get prepared to fail. He even says that you have to get familiar with bad things that could happen (even death) so you’re not paralyzed anymore about what may/may not happen !

To go through this process, you need a lot a bravery but in my opinion it’s the best thing to do since you cannot control those things. It allowed me to understand that we’re all equal when it comes to life’s ups and downs because everybody go though them, but the ones that can surf on these crazy waves in this ocean of possibilities do better in life (and they probably have a similar mindset to Jenna’s ;))

Even if we can’t control the world around us, we can control ourserlves, always progress and live our lives the way we want if we allow ourselves to do it (this was probably the cheesiest conclusion I have ever written haha !)

Skittles & M&M’s  !

Pixie McQueen

***’DEAR FAT PEOPLE’ OR THE BIG CONTROVERSY OF THE WEEK !***

Hey everyone ! Pixie McQueen, here, the boldest fairy of the Internet !

This week at least half of the people on the Internet couldn’t stop talking about the video ‘Dear Fat people’ and I think I also have things to say about this. However, I don’t want to bash the author of the video because I don’t know her personal and I think it’s unnecessary but I’ll go back to that later.

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First, the context: Last Friday, canadian comedian Nicole Arbour (that I didn’t know untill now) uploaded a video, well, not very  smart, about overweight people that definitly buzzed. According to her, it’s supposed to be satirical and a “bomb of truth” so obese people can realize that their health is endangered by their excess of body fat.

What’s wrong with this video : Well, let’s make a list  because there are several issues regarding the statements of this *SMARTY PANTS* (can you feel this strong smell of sarcasm ? =P) when it comes to obesity.

1/ A lot of simply mean criticism towards overweight people : In this video, don’t expect good taste. Well, mocking people saying “Whatcha gon’ do ?” and say you can escape them by “walking at a reasonable pace” or comparing them to a zombie/Frankenstein is not the most clever thing to do. Why ? Let’s imagine the person is actually obese enough to not be able to walk at a reasonable pace, it kinda seems like it’s a disability. Yet is mocking  a disabled person, for example if he/she’s in a wheelchair because he/she cannot walk at a normal pace funny ? I don’t think so. What she said about the “fat family” she bumped into that walked past her because of their leg problems that would be related to their extra weight is at the same level: mean and not funny. Oh yeah, and the joke about how fat people should have to park their car the farthest to walk more and burn more calories ? Same level too. =S

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I don’t think it’s the most flattering comparison…

2/ According to her, overweight people try to make fatshaming happen but it doesn’t really exist: Actually fatshaming is pretty complicated to define because it’s true that overweight people get judged a lot, some people tend to think those people don’t want to take the responsibility of their body nor take care of it it. That’s what Nicole thinks which leads me to the next point.

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3/ She has not-so-convincing arguments: The biggest issue with this video is that Miss Arbours seems to think there’s only one category of “fat people”: the lazy ones that can’t get their asses out of the couch and spend their days eating junk food. It can be true but also, there are as many reasons to be ‘fat’ as overweight people.  Indeed, illnesses can make you gain weight without eating more or exercising less like thyroid or hormonal problems, for example. Being overweight IS unhealthy,(cardiovascular issues, bad blood circulation-and not the Taylor Swift kind-, early deaths, etc…) But, come on, do we need to crack offensive jokes to laugh at those people so they can realize it ? In my opinion, it’s a very bad idea first because, most of the time, they know it (because they’re conscious of their bodies or because of mean jokes or twisted means like ads filled with people with ‘beach bodies’ that make them understand they’re different) and that’ll make them feel like crap. What if this weight has to do with emotional issues ? That can worsen the situation !

Nevertheless, even if she’s wrong, there’s no need to bully her. It’s a thing to say she’s wrong, but insulting her is the next level. I mean, most of us didn’t even know her before this video, so we probably don’t know her personally. If what she says bother you than should explain why she’s wrong instead of calling her names in a hateful way when you don’t have a clue about who she is. I don’t mean to defend her but you can’t tell her she’s mean, negative and ignorant when you’re acting in a mean, negative, and ignorant way yourself, it doesn’t make sense ! Plus, it gives her excuses to victimize herself and believe she’s a barrier against censorship and the system, like an alternative to popular Youtubers. 

In the end, this video represents all of the clichés and hatred that can be directed towards people for bad reasons. It represents judgement we can have about a person’s health by how much he/she weighs. And it’s a good thing ! At least we’ll know what kind of behaviours we can avoid to become more tolerant towards each other and more respectful towards our bodies because it’s so important !

Crabapples (like Lil’ Wayne =P) and baby seals !

Pixie McQueen xx